


Baby's First Word

by HappyHCartoons



Category: South Park
Genre: Father-Son Relationship, Freeform, Kyman - Freeform, M/M, Parent!AU, Parenthood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-13
Packaged: 2018-10-03 23:37:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10261598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyHCartoons/pseuds/HappyHCartoons
Summary: The adventure of Kyle Broflovski and Eric Cartman's son, Abel's, first word.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I had this stored away in my docs for a while now, and I just decided to finish it. lol what are writing skills

A tiny infant known as Abel Broflovski-Cartman gazed at the small red head who held the boy in his arms. 

“Okay, Abe, you stay in your playpen. I have to get dinner started for when your dad comes crashing through the door.” Kyle placed the nine month old baby and gently dropped his little bottom onto the soft mat below. He grabbed a large box that sat beside the pen and dropped numerous toys inside. Plastic teething rings, plushies and a few other goodies landed near the little boys feet. 

Pacifier just dangling from Abel’s mouth, he placed his view back on his father, who walked over to the giant white thing in the corner of the kitchen.

With a bit of a boost, he crawled happily over to the edge of the pen. With force, he took a hold of the bar above him, hoisting his tiny body up so he can see what the male was up to. He struggled to keep his balance, but looked forward with anticipation. 

Kyle had pulled out his bottle and the jug of milk, and Abel’s eyes sparked. His little body bounced in small jolts, giving out a tiny squeal. Kyle caught a glimpse of the bubbly baby and smirked, placing the nipple of the bottle inside of the ring and screwing it tightly back on. He walked back over to his pen and gently handed Abel said bottle. 

“Here you go, Abe.” Kyle cooed with a slight whisper. He watched with calm eyes as the boy sucked the milk happily, plopping back on the alphabet patterned mat. His heart melted at the sight.

Abel closed his eyes in bliss, gulping each sip of the creamy goodness that exited the bottle. He crunched his tiny toes as he opened his eyes. Through the netting that covered each side of the pen, he peeped through the holes. He watched the show that was about unfurl. 

“Okay. He’s settled now.” He clapped his hands together in a feat of success. He went back over to the refrigerator, grabbing a stick of butter from the top shelf. He kept the milk sitting on the kitchen table and locked his eyes with the cabinet above the counter. Huffing at knowing how short he was, he grabbed the chair closest to him, trying his best to keep his balance while grabbing his needed ingredients. His gaze was still blocked by the wooden frame, so he stuck his hand inside, feeling up each and every box laid out. His leg stuck out, standing in a ballerina position. He felt himself lose his grip, the smooth finishing of the chair becoming an enemy to his blue and white tube socks. 

“Shit!” Kyle caught himself just in time to save his small body from plummeting onto the kitchen counter and onto the floor. His fingers gripped the edge of the cabinet firmly, nearly losing his breath.

“I'm a fucking idiot…” he murmured, gently lowering himself to slide off his socks. Once those pieces of clothing were off, it was time to grab the elbow noodles for a second time. “Here goes nothing.” He stretched out his arm, landing on a small rectangular box. He gasped, silently cheering to himself. Grabbing the edge of the cabinet once more, he dragged the small box from the back towards him and it landed on the floor with a thud. He went a bit too hard with his motions but he didn't care. He went for the second box and easily gripped that one before hopping off the chair. 

“Goddamnit, Cartman would've been very helpful right now.”

Abel kept his little gaze on his red head father. He watched as Kyle struggled to find the large saucepan under the kitchen sink. His mouth was still locked on his baby bottle, sucking the unit nearly dry. He ignored the puffs of air coming out of the bottle and kept his eyes glued on Kyle. His tiny feet kicked the bottom of the playpen, the toys around him gaining some momentum and jumping around like Mexican jumping beans. 

Kyle tugged and pulled at the saucepan stuck in the bottom cabinet, and once it was free, it sent him flying, scraping his ass against the tiled floor. The pans clanged as they cluttered into a giant pile. Kyle groaned, and stood up. He didn't want to clean that up right now. He had to make a lazy family dinner. He just left them there for a bit, filling the pan with water and waiting for it to boil. Once he set that up, he leaned down to clean up the pile of pans. 

Abel couldn't help but laugh at his father's mess. He dropped his bottle, and clapped his small pudgy fingers together. Kyle caught him, and couldn't help but smile at him. He walked over to Abel as his son watched him with an astonished expression. 

“I see you finished your milk. Alright, I'll give you a little bit more, just not too much. I have to be quick about it.” Kyle grabbed the boy's bottle, give him a quick peck on the forehead and went over the milk jug still sitting on the kitchen table. He poured about a small portion in when he heard the bubbling of the water. 

“Fuck, Abe, your milk is gonna be a bit late. Just give papa two minutes.” He nearly tipped the little boy's bottle over when he darted for the stove. 

Abe watched Kyle balance the kraft dinner boxes in his arms, a thumb pressed against his mouth. He found more interest in his father trying to create a meal than his absence of milk. 

His small fingers gripped to the netting of the playpen softly, suddenly becoming a tiny bit fussy. He realized now that his other daddy has been gone the entire day, and hasn't seen him. Kyle was the only one here, and the house seems bigger and empty. His stuffed animals weren't enough to keep him company. He needed his daddy, and if he didn't show up now, he'd start to panic. 

Kyle stirred the meal together, setting the timer as he bolted back to the table. Putting the cap back on, he sighed. He trudged back to Abel's playpen, giving the small boy his bottle. He noticed the boy starting to become fussy. 

“What's wrong, Abe? You haven't been fussy at all. You're usually okay when it's just you and me.”

Tears pooled in his green orbs. He just wanted Eric. 

Ever since Eric opened his photography studio, he's become even more busy and less time was getting spent with his son. Abel was very attached to his father, and this distance was starting to get to the boy. At first, he was okay with it, seeing his dad at night and cuddling with him. It became less frequent when Eric was called on special businesses and his photography business was becoming bigger and he was called out for large weddings and events. Sometimes Eric was gone for days at a time, and now that Eric has been gone for three days, it started to eat at the baby. He needed to cuddle in Eric's chubby stomach, listen to his Dad sing to him. Eric called each and every day to check on his son and Kyle but hearing his voice only made him more antsy. He didn't see his daddy, and it only made him more upset. 

“Oh...You miss your daddy, huh?” Kyle could tell what he was feeling. He was feeling the same way. Kyle hadn't seen Eric in three days. No morning kisses, no cuddling, no arguing. It was eerily quiet without him and it bothered both males quite a lot. His body felt cold without him, since Eric was basically a giant heater that kept both of them warm at night. 

“I know, Abe. With daddy gone this long, it's weird. Let's hope he'll be coming home tonight, okay? He called papa today and told me that he's coming home. Let's hope nothing happens to stop his plane from letting him come home.” 

He picked up the small boy and bounced him a bit to help him calm down. It worked a bit but not enough to stop the waterworks from flowing. Instead of him sitting that cramped playpen for longer, he brought Abel over to his high chair and plopped him down. He also snatched Clyde Two from the pen and placed the plush frog beside him. Abel held it close, taking in its smell. It was all he had of his daddy right now, and it made him feel a tiny bit better. 

Kyle had finished stirring the macaroni, taking it off the heat and letting it sit for a bit. He took out a small tub of cream cheese, adding two spoonfuls to the pasta, giving the noodles a much creamier flavor than what the prepackaged cheese did. He added the powder, give it a few heavy stirs and let it cool. He grabbed a small bowl that had a snacky cakes bear printed on the inside and a plain red bowl from the second cabinet above the sink. Glopping the pasta into the bowl, he searched the silverware drawer for Abel's teething spoon. With little difficulty, he found it, sighing in relief as if he lost that spoon for a second time. He stuck a metal spoon into his own dish and gave the smaller bowl to Abel. 

The boy tried to smile but still was a bit upset about missing his daddy. Kyle opened Abel's small right hand and placed his spoon in his hand, helping to teach Abel on how to feed himself properly without flinging macaroni noodles and cheese everywhere. 

As the two are their dinner in peace, the front door began to open. Kyle froze, knowing that could mean only one thing. 

“ _ Kahl?” _

Without stopping, Kyle ran out of the kitchen, leaving poor Abel alone. As Abel watched his papa run for his life into their living room, he felt alone. He didn't know where he went and that he left him like his daddy did. When Kyle didn't return for a few minutes, Abel started to cry. He balled his little fists, shaking his tiny legs. His world seemed empty again, and he felt scared. His papa ran off and he just wanted both of his daddies with him. 

Kyle nearly jumped into Eric's arms as he removed his coat and shoes. 

“Woah! Holy shit! I guess you missed me?” Eric chuckled as he wrapped his arms around Kyle's waist. 

“I missed you a lot Fatass…” Kyle smirked, wrapping his arms as far as they could on Eric's hefty torso. 

“It was three days, Kyle. I've been gone for longer.” Eric grinned, resting his chin on top of Kyle's curls. 

“It felt like fucking forever now that we have Abe.”

“Speaking of Abe, where is he?”

As they stopped conversing, they heard small, shriek-like cries coming from the kitchen. 

“Oh my god, I'm gone for three days and he's fucking crying?!”

“Hey, he wasn't crying when you came home!”

Eric dropped his bag and rushed into the kitchen, seeing his baby boy sobbing his tiny heart out. 

Abel could barely focus, he was so angry. Both of his daddies were gone from the room, and all he felt was sadness. His little body squirmed as snot dripped from his nose, his face turning red as he let out hiccups. His vision was blurry but he could see a figure leaning over him. That didn't stop the boy from sobbing until he felt a familiar warmth settling against him. As his vision cleared, a face began to come into focus. As he looked up, his daddy stared down at him with a worrisome look. 

“Hey, hey, hey little dude, it's okay. It's okay, Daddy's here.” Eric cradled the boy against his chest, unmoved by the boogers landing on his shirt. He was too damn tired to care about that and all he wanted was Abel calmed down. 

Kyle stood behind him, watching the two bond after being away from each other for 72 hours. He felt his heart flutter, he was at ease. Seeing his little ball of sunshine smiling softly at his daddy bouncing him up and down, he felt peaceful. As Eric turned around, he noticed Abel giving Kyle the gloomiest stare. 

Kyle felt a shiver go down his spine, he suddenly felt cold as his son stared him down. What the fuck did he do? His hands became clammy, the Broflovski death stare became clearer as his son stared him down. 

“Abe? Are you okay?” Eric seemed uneasy as he watched the stare off between his husband and his little monster. The air around them became grim. The tension rose high as he waited for someone to make a move. 

Abel raised his small, pudgy arm and pointed at Kyle with such anguish. He opened and closed his mouth multiple times before a sound came out. 

“Jew!” 

The room became silent. Nothing made a sound, only the humming of the refrigerator made a low grunt. Suddenly, a loud snort broke the tension like hot knife through butter. Eric started shaking, laughing uncontrollably. 

“Jew! Jew!” Abel chanted angrily, pointing at Lyle as Kyle's face dropped. 

Eric could barely hold his son, he was barely breathing. His chest heaved, he started hacking and coughing as he laughed harder. 

“Oh-Oh my f-fucking! Gah-Od! That's my boy!”

Kyle just glared at Eric, “You're more happy about him calling me a Jew instead of being proud of him saying his first word?!” 

Eric could barely comprehend Kyle's words, he was just in this state of euphoria you can only reach when laughing so hard, you nearly pass out. 

Kyle face palmed, giving up with both of them. 

Eric was home for ten minutes and he witnessed some of the greatest moments of his life. His son saying his first word, and his son calling Kyle a Jew.


End file.
